Thursday, May 16, 2013

Awesome Deal !! TWO Folding Pocket Chairs - $14.99


Folding Pocket Chair: 1.Small,fits in you pocket! 2.Ultra-Strong Holds up to 250 lbs 3.Take A seat anywherer! 4.Steel frame
Amazing small Folding Pocket Chair with carry bag :
Now, you can have a chair with you wherever you go. The Amazing Pocket Chair folds so compactly, you can fit it in your pocket. It opens in a snap, holds up to 250 lbs. and folds up with ease. It's ideal for use at the beach, park, gardening, camping and more. Also stores easily in your handbag, glove box, knapsack, golf bag, tackle box, gym bag and more. Includes carry case.







The Best Daily Deals in Nationwide - SlashKings.com - Two Folding Pocket Chairs

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

"BBQ Etiquette" - This one is for the ladies, Thanks Judi


When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:

(1) The woman buys the food.

(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.

(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.

(4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three meter exclusion zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities can take place without the interference of the woman.

Here comes the important part: (5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.

(7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he flips the meat

Important again: (8) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

(9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.

(10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes

And most important of all: (11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.

(12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed ' her night off ', and, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women..

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

"If" - Rudyard Kipling as recommended by Jason

A friend recommended this uplifting poem and never having read it before, I felt compelled to share (even though I will never be a man)...

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

Monday, May 6, 2013

25 Signs You're All Grown Up

1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.

2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.

3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.

4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.

5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.

6. You watch the Weather Channel.

7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up."

8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.

9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."

10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door won't turn down the stereo.

Sunday, May 5, 2013

Romantic Rhymes...sorta


THESE ARE ENTRIES TO A WASHINGTON POST COMPETITION ASKING FOR A RHYME WITH THE MOST ROMANTIC FIRST LINE BUT .... THE LEAST ROMANTIC SECOND LINE:

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
But I only slept with you, because I was pissed.

*************************
I thought that I could love no other
Until, that is, I met your brother.

************************
Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's
empty and so is your head.
**************************

Friday, May 3, 2013

The Pal diet. I suppose you could substitute any kibble

I have 2 dogs & I was buying a large bag of Pal (dog food) at Woolworths and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Pal Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Pal nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.