Happy New Years!

I'm not usually superstitious but I will say that on New Years Eve 1997 I ate a spoonful of black eyed peas for the first and last time (I hate them and was coerced, not to mention realllly drunk); I started dating Jerry that year and never looked back!

Chuckle for the Day - Manogram

As I grow closer and closer to my 40th birthday and my first one, this is all the more humorous

Funky Violet Computer Glasses *Updated*

So I got these Lucky Brand glasses free from Coastal Contacts.

I got them with no RX lenses and anti-glare film so I could wear them with my contacts when I was on the computer to help reduce eyestrain and the nausea I was experiencing..  The frames were free and the Anti-Glare, Anti-Scratch, UV Protection with S&H all came to $27!  Not too shabby!  It's hard to find good quality computer/reading glasses for that price with the glare/UV coating.

They are brown on the outside and violet on the inside  Lucky Brand Joni Tan & Violet Frames.  They are a little bolder than my usual style because I was feeling like being frisky and violet is supposed to really make green eyes POP!

If you'd like to order a pair of free glasses, click on this link and use the coupon code FirstPairFree at checkout:  FREE PAIR OF GLASSES.

Once again, I lost my medic alert bracelet...,

I lost my bracelet yet again!  

Geesh!  I took it off when I was coloring my hair and I put it in my pocket on the way out to the Highland Games so I could put it on in the car and POOF!, gone...

Prepping for Vegetable Juice Fast

We just got home from the grocery store.  Ideally we would purchase all our produce from the South of the James Farmers Market, but since we are getting a few day jump on our New Years Resolution, most of the foods are out of season.

We are going to be focusing on mainly "green" juices as they are the most cleansing using carrots, apples and limes for flavoring.  We will be making fruit smoothies also, but only as a dessert type of drink since the sugar levels in fruit are very high.

Christmas Dog - by Shel Silverstein

Tonight's my first night as a watchdog, 

And here it is Christmas Eve. 

The children are sleeping all cozy upstairs, 

While I'm guardin' the stockin's and tree.

What's that now---footsteps on the rooftop? 

Could it be a cat or a mouse? 

Who's this down the chimney? 

A thief with a beard--- And a big sack for robbin' the house?

Top 10 Psychiatric Christmas Carols

1. Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?

2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Kings Disoriented Are

3. Dementia --- I Think I'll be Home for Christmas

4. Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me

5. Manic --- Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and.....

A Dog's Christmas Promises - A Doggy Wonderland

Christmas is for humans, and I will not ruin the surprises by opening all their presents.

Christmas light bulbs, Christmas ornaments, Christmas stockings, and tinsel from the Christmas tree are not food.

I am the alpha dog, therefore I do not need to protect my new Christmas rawhide from the omega dog by taking it outside to eat when the wind chill is -10 F.

I will not demolish the Christmas tree and drag the string of lights out into the backyard through the doggy door.

Jerry's Juicer is all ready to go!

Waiting for my BFF (also known as hubby) to get home from work, so I decided to go ahead and set up his Xmas present and have it all ready to go for him when he comes home!

Yes he already got the HP Touchpad, but I scored that for only $99 at HP's Sunday night fire sale on eBay.  He has been talking about doing a juice fast for months so I decided to get him a juicer so come New Year's Day, he'll be all set to start.  

***Email Subscribers***

If you subscribed to my blog via email and it has not been working, that is because I had to change the feed to stop reading San Antonio and to correctly read Richmond, VA.  

Sorry I couldn't inform you of the change, but all my email subscribers are set up to be anonymous.

Just re-subscribe under my picture on the right and it will start again

The year, 1991... Harley David, You Son of a Bitch!

So this made me laugh today and smile big enough my cheeks hurt.  It brought back some awesome memories from high school in San Antonio and immediately after...

Back in like 1988, my friend Laura made me an awesome mix tape of Alternative/Underground music.  The tape was awesome and got a lot of playtime in my tape deck.  The last time I remember having this tape was in the fall of 1990 when I drove from Devine (Hell) to San Antonio with a friend (whose name I think was Stephen) to drop some stuff off for his dad, who worked in some high security area of the base.

We jammed all the way to SA and back.  For years I thought I had left that tape in his truck and never got it back.  I loved that damn tape!

Flash forward to today, almost 22 years later and out of the blue, a random post on my facebook wall that was actually a link to a reporters video of his journey inside North Korea, and PRESTO!, I learn what became of my favorite mix tape.

eBook: Deed to Death : D.B. Henson

What I'm reading now:  Amazon.com: Deed to Death eBook: D.B. Henson: Kindle Store

AT TWENTY-NINE, TONI MATTHEWS IS ON THE CUSP OF HAVING IT ALL—a successful career as one of the top real estate agents in Nashville, great friends, and the partner and family she’d always longed for in her fiancé, architect Scott Chadwick.

But just days before their planned nuptials, Scott plummets to his death at one of his construction sites and Toni is forced to bury her fiancé on their wedding day. 

Now living all alone in their new, custom-made dream house, dealing with her loss becomes even harder when the police rule his death a suicide. Yet Toni refuses to believe that it could be anything other than a tragic accident.

Chuckle for the Day - Cat Map

From Humor

Three Black Men Totally Naked

At the National Art Gallery in Dublin, a husband and wife were staring at a portrait that had them completely confused.

The painting depicted three black men totally naked sitting on a park bench. Two of the figures had black willies, but the one in the
middle had a pink Willie.

The curator of the gallery realized that they were having trouble interpreting the painting and offered his assessment.

Need to Calm My Nerves

2 years of therapy and today all I want to do is crawl into bed and cry.  It is taking every ounce of control I have not to let the tears flow today at work.

Evidently, my mother has remarried and I received an email from my new Stepfather (as he signed it).  Since I don't know him, I am assuming his intentions were most likely good.  Probably a misguided attempt at facilitating some sort of reconciliation.  I'm sure he did not realize how much anxiety this would cause me, at least I hope he didn't as that would be cruel.

I don't understand how someone could expect I would want to communicate with them, when I am sure every thing they have ever been told about me is negative, cruel and blatantly untrue.  There is no way i would ever convince him I am not the evil, conniving bitch I have been made out to be, so what is the point?  It makes me very uncomfortable.

The original 'Slap Chop"

It is cheaper to buy Almonds for our salads whole rather than sliced or chopped as we had been doing.  I picked up a bag of whole almonds and trying crushing them in a paper bag but that didn't work very well.  Then I remembered, I had my grandparents chopper.

It is very basic and who knows how old.  It is simply a mason jar with raised markings indicating how much is in the jar, an aluminum screw on cap, steel blades attached to a spring topped off with a wooden knob.

Not in the Mood for a Brain Scan

Well over the last 2 weeks I've met with 2 of my new doctors in RVA.  I still have one more to go.

I was holding off on finding a Hematologist, for a while, but one of my Dr's thinks some of my meds could be causing some of my symptoms and the other thinks that it could be a growth/tumor causing some symtpoms and wants to rule it out.  So I guess I will find a Hematologist to schedule a PET Scan.  I haven't had one since early 2010, I'm overdue as it is.

So this week I have to find a Hematologist to schedule the scan and establish follow up care from my bout with Hodgkin's Lymphoma.

Chuckle for the Day - Cassette Tape

From Humor

$40.00 Prescription Sunglasses

Yay!!  My new RX sunglasses arrived today!

For $44, from GlobalEyeglass.com, I got a pair of Tortoise frames with a nice case, dark outdoor reflective tint with anti-scratch, anti-glare, UV coating!  My eyes are -6.00 each, so glasses this cheap are amazing!!  And you can use the coupon code below for an extra 5% off!

Chuckle for the Day - Camel Toe

From Humor

Chuckle for the Day - Calories (noun)

From Humor

Chuckle for the Day - Southern Belle

From Humor

Why are they all wearing red shirts?

If you don't get the joke, it's okay, just means you are not a Trekkie!

Another day, another dollar

Romeo, Romeo, Romeo...

Mommies little boy.  He is going through some separation anxiety right now.

We use a doggie gate to keep them in the kitchen during the day and even when we double it up with a standard baby gate which is double the height of the doggie gate, he still manages to climb out.  I come home for lunch every day to let them out and there he is waiting for me on the couch by the door and the same thing happens at 5:00.  Jerry has started calling him "Roofini".

He knows he's in trouble by the tone of my voice, but I'm not sure he knows why.  It's understandable.  We rescued him in June 2009 and in July 2009 my health took a turn and I was not able to work for almost a year.  When I was able to go back to work in July 2010 (until May 2011 when it was time to get ready for the move to Richmond), I was only working part time about 15-20 hours a week so he has really never been home alone all day.

Chuckle for the Day - Play One in Your Life

From Humor

23 Truths About Being an Adult

Chuckle for the Day - Lady With Class

From Humor

My husband's sense of humor. Gotta love him!

So I was catching up on my email and found this; Jerry's response to my big fall on Thanksgiving Sunday once the worrying was over...

Why do I keep falling???

It's been a wonderful four months in Richmond so far!  Even though Steven Spielberg keeps making me change my commute to work, it still hasn't taken more than 15 minutes on my longest drive.  I like the short commute and Jerry likes it when I don't have to drive very far.

Jerry has taken to teasing me about all my trips and falls.  I go upstairs and on my way down he'll say "See you on the next trip!", or "How about next fall".  He's such a comedian!  Even though he teases, I know he worries quite a bit.

Over the past few months my "clumsiness" has gotten worse.  I trip on everything it seems, from my own feet to the air!  I can barely get out of bed in the morning without getting a toe stuck in a sheet and falling out of bed.  So far no serious injury has occurred, but it's a miracle.

The Sunday after Thanksgiving was the worst one yet!

Chuckle for the Day - Defriend You

From Humor

Be amazed in 30 seconds...

You will NEVER guess what he is carving on the Craftsman Bandsaw!

Chuckle for the Day - Beer Can, Bacon

From Humor

Chuckle for the Day - Bath Day

From Humor

Awesome Multi Color Cake

I saw this on Diane's blog shortly before Halloween and even though she calls it a Halloween cake, it is quite easily adapted to any occasion.

All it takes is some cake mix, food coloring and a little creativity.  I'm planning on making one for my office next month with red, green and white.

Valentine's Day = Red, Pink and White
Easter = Pastels; Greens, Blues, Yellows, Pinks
Baby Shower, St. Patrick's Day, 4th of July, Birthdays...

One Dish Chicken & Rice Bake

1 cup regular long-grain white rice, uncooked
1 can (10 3/4 ounces) cream of mushroom soup
1 1/2 cups water
1 envelope dry onion soup mix
4 boneless chicken breast halves, without skin
ground black pepper
Preparation:

Grease a 2-quart baking dish. Heat oven to 375°.
Put rice in the dish. Combine the soup, water, and onion soup mix; pour over the rice and stir to blend ingredients. Place the chicken in the rice mixture and sprinkle lightly with pepper.

Cover tightly with foil and bake for about 1 hour, or until rice is tender and chicken is cooked through. The chicken should register about 175° on an instant-read thermometer.

Serves 4.

Chuckle for the Day - Black Friday!!

Our First Attempt at Making Homemade Ginger Ale

Well, we picked up some ginger at the farmers market last Saturday and decided to experiment with making our own Ginger Ale, which is my favorite!  We are also going to be making some caramelized ginger for tummy aches, acidic stomach and motion sickness.

I started by looking up a bunch of recipes to get the general idea and then took pieces of different ones to experiment on my own.

Step 1:  Grating the Ginger.  I read that it was easier to grate when frozen.  It was easy to grate, except for freezing my fingers!

Happy Thanksgiving from the Swedish Chef!

Can't get my brother out of my head....

My brother keeps popping into my head during the day, when I’m trying to sleep and even into my dreams.  

All the news about Sandusky and his victims keep my brother in the fore front of my mind day and night, but that isn't the only thing making me think about him.

The main reason I’m worried about him is him possibly relocating to Oregon.  It is too close to Seattle where everything went to hell several years ago.  I don’t think it is healthy for him to go back to an area of the country where so many things went so drastically wrong in the not so distant past.  I think he needs help that can’t be found in a bottle.  I personally do not have a problem with people smoking, having been around stoned people and drunken people since a very early age; I’ll take the stoned people any day!  They are much mellower and less prone to violence than drunken people, they just stink more that drunken people.

Chuckle for the Day - Ass Family

From Humor

Me & My Fat Ass!!!

I am so frustrated!

The main reason Jerry and I wanted to move was so we could change our lifestyle without me passing out from heat stroke.  Since we moved, we have spent more time outside walking/hiking around than we have since our honeymoon in 1999!  We have eaten more salad (with lite/fat free dressing) in 3 months than we have in the last 3 years.  We hardly eat out, if we do it's only once a week.  Our one indulgence lately is when we go to the farmers market on Saturday to get our produce for the week we grab something different to eat every week and share it.

Now given, the first 2 months here we weren't out and about much and with the move we were eating out while driving here and the first week until our stuff got here, so we were already off to an "inflated" start but damn!!  I am at my highest weight EVER right now!

Chuckle for the Day - Argument With A Woman?

From Humor

Chuckle for the Day - Ant Eater

From Humor

Eve's Choice: Discovering God's Blessing

I am not an extremely religious person, but I do think it's cool that my boss wrote this book.

You can purchase the book on Amazon by following this link:
Amazon.com: Eve's Choice: Discovering God's Blessing (9780687057863): Walter Graham: Books

Below is Senior Pastor Rhonda VanDyke Colby's synopsis and review of this text:

Looks like they’re wrapping up...

Well on the drive into work today, as usual I pass the capitol building and lawns on my right, but this morning was a little different.  On my left instead of the usual Kraft Services Trucks, security guards and costumed extras, it looks like they’re wrapping it up at this location.

It’s a little sad.  It was always an interesting ride into work having to stop so men in colonial clothing and ladies in large hoop skirts could cross the street, it really added to the flavor of downtown Richmond, especially for a newcomer like me.

Chuckle for the Day - Acute Angina

From Humor

History of Veterans Day

History of Veterans Day

World War I – known at the time as “The Great War” - officially ended when the Treaty of Versailles was signed on June 28, 1919, in the Palace of Versailles outside the town of Versailles, France. However, fighting ceased seven months earlier when an armistice, or temporary cessation of hostilities, between the Allied nations and Germany went into effect on the eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month. For that reason, November 11, 1918, is generally regarded as the end of “the war to end all wars.”

Soldiers of the 353rd Infantry near a church at Stenay, Meuse in France, wait for the end of hostilities. This photo was taken at 10:58 a.m., on November 11, 1918, two minutes before the armistice ending World War I went into effect

Chuckle for the Day - Internet History

From Humor

Chuckle for the day - Amish Virus

From Humor

Happy Guy Fawkes Day

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guy_Fawkes

Sent from my iPhone

Dog thefts up sharply in U.S.

When your baby is missing, a piece of you is missing with them. If your baby is "dognapped" and held for ransom, you have to resist the urge to give the person holding your dog an ass chewing.

Romeo disappeared in 2009 and was held for ransom. Unfortunately you can't arrest someone for being a jerk and without being able to prove the person holding your dog took them, there isn't much you can do.

In our case they did not contact us until the missing posters were up and then spent all day calling us and "negotiating" a reward until we "offered" enough $$ to make it worth their while to give him back.

After that we had him chipped, but while everyone should have this done (most vets charge around $25 for this procedure) it doesn't work well against dog nappers unless someone takes him to the vet.

Here is the article from the Mother Nature Network:

MISSING: Some stolen pets are held for ransom, some are resold on the Internet and others are taken because thieves don't want to pay a purchase price or adoption fee. Others are used in satanic rituals, as bait in dog fights or killed for their fur or meat, among other gruesome fates. (Photo: D'Arcy Norman/flickr)

Dog thefts are up by nearly 50 percent so far this year as compared to the same period a year ago, the American Kennel Club says, warning the actual number could indeed be much higher.

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Based on reports in the media and information from clients who had enrolled their pets in the AKC's recovery service, the AKC says 224 pet dogs were stolen in the first seven months of this year, up from 150 in the same period in 2010.

"I'm certain the number is much higher, because our figures only track dogs that are registered in our pet recovery service, whose owners report them stolen," AKC spokeswoman Lisa Peterson told AFP.

According to the American Pet Products Association, some 46 million Americans own a total of more than 78 million dogs.

Dogs are an easy target for pet thieves because they are "out and about," said Peterson.

"They are stolen out of parked cars while people are running errands and even snatched when they're with their owner in the park," she said.

"We've even seen a new trend of dogs being stolen from shelters and adoption events for the first time this year," she said, citing the story of a man who stole a dog from a shelter after his application to adopt the pet was denied.

Some stolen pets are held for ransom, some are resold on the Internet and others are taken because thieves don't want to "pay a purchase price or adoption fee," the AKC says.

Peterson noted that one woman paid $10,000 to get her dog back.

Other organizations, such as stolenpets.com and petfinder.com, say up to 2 million animals are stolen each year in the United States, and only 10 percent of those are returned to their owners.

Petfinder, a website owned by Discovery Communications that connects homeless pets with potential owners, says stolen pets are used in satanic rituals, as bait in dog fights or killed for their fur or meat, among other gruesome fates.

But Peterson urged pet owners not to be alarmed by what she called "myths" about what happens to stolen animals.

"I've seen that two million figure floating around, but where they got it, I don't know because there's no national tracking of pet theft in the United States," she said.

"And the stories about what happens to stolen pets can be very scary, but unless there is supporting data, they should be treated as myths," she said.

Copyright 2011 AFP Global Edition

Dog thefts up sharply in U.S. | MNN - Mother Nature Network